I was bored so I was uhh licking my face. And on my upper lip I licked off something weird, small, and very salty.
I think I just ate a rogue booger.

While making my mac n cheese I was thinking about fractions,
and I realized if you took a fraction of a whole number, and wanted to make it the next biggest fraction of a whole number, all you have to do is add that next biggest fraction multiplied by your current fraction to your current fraction.
[are you totally lost yet?]

Like say you had 1/4 and you wanted to make it 1/3, all you have to do is add a third of 1/4 to 1/4 and you'll get 1/3.

like 1/3 of 1/4 is 1/12 right? and then you add that to 1/4 which is 3/12

so 1/12 + 3/12 = 4/12 which is 1/3, the next biggest fraction of a whole number!

Holy shit!

It works!

Say you want to make 1/7 into 1/6
1/6 of 1/7 is 1/42, and 1/7 is 6/42. 1/42 + 6/42 = 7/42 = 1/6

MY GOD.
I am a mathematical genius.

You know your life is sad when you fill out a survey on the M-space and the question is:
"What's the best thing that's happened all day?"

and your answer is:
"I found a banana and I ate it."

I got a gnarly papercut the other day...

trying to open a band-aid.

Christ.

Couple of weeks ago I lost a penny down my bra. It was a tragic moment, for I searched and searched and could not find the blasted thing.
That is until later that night I was changing into my jammies and out of the corner of my eye I saw a strange brown thing on my boob. I flipped out a little, until I realized it was my penny.
Reunited at last.

Some hair just fell in my face and I mistook it for a moth. I flipped out momentarily but then went back to what I was doing. Luckily no one was around to see.

Ever stare at a word
and realize, what the hell, that can't be English.
Like, the word catch.
Talk about awkward looking.

catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch
catch

I love muffins.
Love 'em.
But dear god, they've got to be moist. They really do!
Nothing can ruin your day like a dry muffin.

Sometimes I just stand at the sink and wash my hands over and over in hot soapy water for minutes.
I find it very soothing.
Especially when I'm distracted or distressed.
Too bad it makes my fingers crackle.

I have three friendship bracelets on my wrist.
They tickle a lot sometimes when I least expect it.
Sometimes it makes me jump for dear life cause I think some shit is like... on me.
But it's not.
It's just my friends telepathically tickling me via friendship bracelet.
Douchebags.

I don't have a problem with other people hearing me pee in public restrooms.
I don't.
But in a public bathroom, empty or not, my bladder will simply SHUT OFF and not allow me to pee.
Doesn't matter how much I want to, or how badly I have to.
I just can't!
It's rather frustrating.
And I'd ask if anyone else has this problem, but they don't. I'm pretty sure I'm the only one here.

I think writers who credit their sources in a "works cited" format are douchebags.
My theory is that "works cited" is a way for people to sort-of-but-not-really give credit to other people by writing it in completely incoherent gibberish.
Why can't you just say who wrote it first, and where, rather than encrypt it in a puzzle that takes you about twenty minutes to decode?

Damn!!
I have been eating dutch mint candies for a little while, but now I'm craving some sour jellybeans.
Now I have the beans right beside me; getting them's not the problem.
The problem is that they're going to taste really gross with this lingering minty freshness in my mouth.
Should I do it?
I think I'm going to do it.

How come Cheerios don't always make you cheerful?

I've discovered that as a teenager I'm often subjected to being in more than one conflicting mood at once. Such as excited and angry at the same time, or happy and sad. Still I always wind up somehow feeling the same thing in the end.
Hungry.

Also, when I was a wee chidlum--I don't actually remember how old--It was around the time of the George Bush vs. Al Gore election deal:
I remember hearing Al Gore supported abortion, and I didn't know what that was.
My friend told me it was when mothers could choose to kill their children that they didn't want. So I "supported Bush" because I thought Al Gore "hated children".
Haha.
Silly kids.

When I was little, say about eight or nine, I believed that when conceiving a child the men made the bodies and women made the heads, and that's why everyone thought gay marriage was wrong.
I didn't want to marry a woman because then I'd have a two headed baby.

I can't stop eating, gross!
Do you ever crave something in particular, so your stomach is like HEY I'M HUNGRY DAMMIT and so you go to get food, but you don't actually have what you want? So then you're forced to eat something thrice as fattening and one third as delicious.

If you do that, you're really disgusting.

I do that though.

I keep finding myself wishing it were tomorrow just so I can write something new in my blog.
But god damn it, it's my blog.
I'll write it in whenever the hell I want, as many god damn times a day as I feel like it!!


I don't actually have anything to say, anyway.

I was going to note that this is my 4th post in the "23rd" trend. But I suppose now it's really just very early in the morning of the 24th.

Anyway. Just posting a thought before I go to sleep and completely lose it:

It's very funny that we should ever tell people to take their time. Everyone knows "Take your time" means "I'm being kind to you, thus you should feel increasingly guilty and hurry the hell up".

Thought I should add:

Funny that my only posts so far have been on the 23rd of some given month.
Too bad I will inevitably break this short-lived pattern.

It appears I have been a bit of a douche and abandoned my blog.
I was thinking I had something interesting to say, but I can't seem to remember.

Though I ought to share that yesterday afternoon I did see a goose raping a duck.

Well, shit.
I meant to make my first post three days ago, on my birthday. You know, to commemorate the opening of this fabulous blog with my first day of seventeenhood.
Oh well, I'm over it.
I'm going to try and only publish the very most useless information in here, for I have learned that blogs are a place for words with very little purpose.
I plan to stay true to this.